


My Christmas list

by kizaten



Category: Free!
Genre: M/M, Mook's sappy date, Rin's dreams
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-20
Updated: 2015-12-20
Packaged: 2018-05-07 14:08:41
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5459228
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kizaten/pseuds/kizaten
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It had been running inside his head since… since the moment he realized something like that would happen. Haru was his ray of light, and it wasn’t a complete surprise when he came to such conclusion, after finding himself talking about him without any provocation at all.</p><p>Rin could think of tons of cheesy scenes and phrases for him. Traveling together only made this grew more. </p><p>Even after messing up his perfect chance in said trip, escaping from a confession with this admiration issue instead, he couldn’t help but imagine it. He couldn’t help it anymore.</p>
            </blockquote>





	My Christmas list

**Author's Note:**

  * For [quietinthelibrary](https://archiveofourown.org/users/quietinthelibrary/gifts).



It had been strange... really strange and incredibly awkward, but he finally had a  _yes_  to be smiling this bright even on a day like this. He was standing outside, folded in his coat and chilling, but there was no way he wouldn’t be this happy. Smiling, red cheeks -the weather... just the weather, and waiting for someone to arrive.

How did this happen? The answer was easy: he dreamed. Dreaming like a stupid little boy in love. But he wasn’t a little boy anymore, and he.. wasn’t really sure about the last part. 

He moved again, making his legs wake up and shake the freezing numbness he felt since he stopped walking, the snow around his feet and holding him there, still, trapped, but he couldn't think on a place he’d rather be. 

 

And so, the door clicked open.

 

Rin shook the snow from his head and his veins, taking a couple of steps forward as he pretended he just arrived. What he couldn’t fake was his surprise when he saw the other stepping out of his house, sliding the door closed and locking it maybe for the first time on the month. 

Dark blue boots, skinny grey jeans folding those strong elegant legs and the long blue coat where his fine torso hide from the cold of the weather. Scarf around his neck, covering that small mouth that greeted him shyly before their eyes met, immediately making him lose it. Rin stopped for a while, no need to say how hard it was for him to find his way back from those vivid blue pounds, blinking back to reality just to mutter a stupid “Hi” smiling nervously. 

 

Haru didn’t say a thing, he probably didn’t notice, or didn’t care...

Rin wouldn’t care about the weather now. He was used to Haru’s coldness some times, feeling it quite nice and comfy. Even warm on his own style.

 

“What?” The black haired asked, frowning to Rin’s face as he stared, paralyzed.

“Nothing. Sorry... Come!” Rin shook off his thought again, focusing on the plans he had, he turned and moved, waiting for Haru not to stay behind.

 

He heard his legs struggling with the snow as he walked, it was heavy by this time of the year and maybe walking wasn’t completely a good idea, but there was no other way to leave Haru’s place since it was practically inaccessible for any kind of car. 

 

“Where are we going?” Haru asked, Rin could see himself rolling his eyes and sighing, it took less than expected before Haru started to complain. “You won’t tell me?”

“Not yet. It’s a surprise!” He said smiling playfully, stopping so he could catch up and stand beside him. 

Haru looked away, at least he didn’t push him or turned back to his warm home instead of keep walking out with this freezing cold.

“Lights are going to be there tomorrow too. The whole month, indeed. Why tonight?” Haru asked after a while, they were getting closer to the downtown, Iwatobi was a small town and it practically had just one special point for the crowds to focus their attention and decoration. 

 

And the flashiest it was, the best it would be for Rin to chose it as their objective. 

 

It had been running inside his head since... since the moment he realized something like that would happen. Haru was his ray of light, and it wasn’t a complete surprise when he came to such conclusion, after finding himself talking about him without any provocation at all.

Rin could think of tons of cheesy scenes and phrases for him. Traveling together only made this grew more. 

Even after messing up his perfect chance in said trip, escaping from a confession with this admiration issue instead, he couldn’t help but imagine it. He couldn’t help it anymore.

It had been easier when he was young, he thought he was just being friendly but as he grew up, things got more and more clear for him. Although distance was a matter of fact, he couldn’t completely give up on it.

 

And it came to him. 

 

The lights, the snow, a quiet walk, the cold wind. Everyone would know it. He was a normal healthy Japanese young man, he knew what the most special night was... and it was Christmas. The most romantic night of the year! 

He was nervous, his hands shaky, his face red for sure, but at the end he managed to ask him out that night, and Haru said yes. He said yes! With that blank deadpan face of him, maybe he couldn’t think of any other option he could have... but it was a yes for him!

 

“Why?” He asked, an obvious tone of incredulity on his voice. “Haru, It’s Christmas! You have to see the Christmas decorations on Christmas so it counts!” 

 

Haru rolled his eyes, Rin smiled. He saved it.

 

They kept walking, Rin was busy thinking on how his breath was visible with this cold and giving occasional looks to Haru’s face. He couldn’t help but stare, Haru was criminally cute like this, his face red and hidden behind the scarf as his breath came out too. He kept staring until Haru stared back... again.

He tried to get his nerves down and get himself back together joking with him, talking about his plans, how Christmas was for him on the years he spent away from his homeland, just wanting to feel this more casual even when his mind was full with romantic date thoughts.

Until he couldn't hep it and what he tried to bottle up came out without warning.

Blame it on the weather, Haru beside him or his own nature.

 

"It’s such a shame Sakura and Christmas never meet.” Rin whispered looking up a tree they found on their way. 

“What do you mean?”

“Well... I’d like to see Sakura and snow at the same time.”

“Impossible.”

“I know!” Rin said glaring at him, “I just... Well, this is not that bad, this tree is not that lonely without the flowers.”

Haru looked at him, confused, as Rin walked beside getting closer to the nearest branch up to them. 

 

To be true, what Rin wanted was to have everything he liked the most together on special events like this. This was, after all, the first Christmas he was lucky, or brave enough, to ask for Haru’s company. 

 

He walked closer to Haru, reaching out his hand to Haru’s face. He had some snow on his cheek, and Rin couldn’t really believe he didn’t notice when it would be so obvious with the temperature contrast.  He hoped for him to feel warm with him that close.

“It’s almost like a petal...” He whispered as he wiped it away from Haru’s face.

Blue eyes looked straight to him for a second before the black haired looked away humming. Haru moved his hand, close to Rin’s hair but going even higher, reaching up to the branch right upon him. He pulled it and jumped a step back, leaving Rin freezing as the snow fell over him.

“Now you’re covered up in Sakura, right?” Haru said with that deadpan face of his, making Rin to hiss, not only in cold but upset.

 

Haru ruined it! Was it that he couldn’t feel a thing?

 

After shaking the snow away from his hair and clothes and crossing his fingers to avoid catching a cold after getting that unexpected gesture of the other, Rin kept walking pulling Haru with him to keep him away from any other funny idea to fool him. He was glad Haru could be funny sometimes, but he wasn’t that happy to have this mischievous side of him attacking right now.

 

“I’m getting tired.” Haru complained, making Rin to roll his eyes again. “Where are we going?”

“Almost there...”

“There are lights there. If you want to see some, then lets just stop here.” Haru said pulling Rin to make him stop.

The red head was about to start another argument about how impatient Haru was sometimes and how he always managed to kill the atmosphere when he turned around and saw it.

 

It was beautiful.

 

A big cathedral he couldn’t remember seeing before, decorated on the outside and with light coming out through the Crystal windows in such a way... that could only match Haru’s eyes themselves. 

Rin gasped out loud, doing as Haru said and stopping to see that. This wasn’t what he planed, but it was also such a luck to find it like this.

His head turned, just to make sure if they were looking to the same thing, maybe he was just tripping after running into something when he pulled Haru with him or something but... This was real.

 

Just as real as them.

 

Or so he thought, before having a better look at the other.

 

Haru,  _oh Haru!_  The way the lights hit him after passing through the crystal, the colors on his face and hair, his eyes.... Rin was lost. And he was almost sure Haru wasn’t real at all.

The black haired looked at him, catching him staring for the third time in the same night, but he didn’t looked away or asked why, he just looked back at him.

And Rin’s mouth dropped open.

Haru walked closer to him, looking down to the snow his feet kicked as he moved forward. 

“Was this what you wanted?” He asked softly, looking back to the Cathedral’s windows. “How long should we look at this so it counts?”

“Well...” He cleared his throat and his hand run through his hair again. “This is really amazing but, it’s not what I had on mind.”

 

Rin held his hand open and looked to Haru’s eyes, waiting.

 

“How long?” 

“You’ll know when we get there. Come” Rin offered again, smiling to him and hoping for it to work to get his mind out of his lazy mode.

Haru took his hand and followed.

It was a fact they’d warm up like this, specially Rin. He wasn’t really aware of how deep this was getting to his nerves. He was holding Haru’s hand, walking through the snow on their way to see the Christmas decoration together...

 

Little Rin would be so jealous of him right now.

 

As they walked, the roads started to get more and more lively, with more people around than before. It was easy to tell they were almost there. Rin moved faster, going through the others and trying to avoid them from slowing him and Haru. The other asked for him to slow down, but Rin couldn't hear a thing. 

Nothing but the sounds around and his own heartbeat.

Space was getting more and more crowded, forcing him to tighten the grip on Haru’s hand and for them to pull and push to keep moving together. Rin opened their way through the crowd asking for permission as he pushed them away, dragging Haru with him to finally stop somewhere.

Breathless, Haru looked up to Rin.

“Are we... in there?” He asked panting.

Rin nodded with a bright smile on his face.

 

The lights hung around, getting extra decoration with the snow that fell earlier, the windows of the places around fully decorated. Window displays lighting everything, the trees had lights and ribbons as well, everything was perfect and just as Rin had dreamed all these years.

And in the middle of the complete scene, piercing the sky and rising to get all the attention, there it was. The Ferris Wheel. The mere sight of it made his hear race. It was amazing, and the perfect spot to see everything around from a higher view. Now that they were there, Rin just couldn’t wait.

He felt proud of being there, standing in front of Haru with a full smile like if he made the whole thing himself only for Haru to see it.

 

He looked down at the other as he panted, waiting for a reaction.

 

And so, Haru looked up.

And he kept panting.

“Rin...” He said, almost recovered from the run. “What am I supposed to see?”

 

Matsuoka felt the atmosphere devouring him. Why? Why on Earth was Haru this...? 

 

He shook these thoughts away, taking another step to pull Haru up again, not paying any attention to his pleas asking him to wait, Rin kept walking. He forced his way to the line and waited for it to move, maybe once they were up in the sky Haru could react and feel.

 

_Feel._

 

“Rin!”

 

But Haru kept fighting, wanting to get away. Maybe this had been a bad idea. The worst he could ever have. 

 

“Rin, it hurts...”

 

He only pulled Haru out of his place to make him freeze, to feel awkward around the crowd, the cold wind and the snow all for

nothing.

 

“Rin!”

 

How did he thought it would work? Haru wasn’t even looking at him.

 

“Rin!”

 

“Sir, are you going up or not?” 

 

A different voice woke him up. It was their turn.

“Yeah, sorry.” He shook his head and moved forward, letting go of Haru’s wrist. 

He got in and had a seat, looking down the floor before getting to see outside again, maybe Haru wasn’t even there by now.

And he was right, Haru wasn’t on the line anymore.

He was in front of him and closing the door.

 

Haru was with him after all.

 

Rin kept quiet, looking out through the window until thy were up. He was nervous and thinking how of a good idea this was. 

He gave a quick look to the other in front of him. Haru was looking out too, his expression serene as always and he was still wondering if this was something he’d really like, and not only Rin could enjoy himself. Was he upset? Wanting to get off? Was he ok with all this?

 

Would everything be ok after this?

 

To his eyes Haru was and always had been incredible, strong and firm, a bit stubborn sometimes but definitely better than he could believe himself. There was no way he wouldn’t fell for someone like him, and there was no way he wouldn’t do his best to share this night with him.

But he started to feel his best wasn’t enough after all. The idea he had of a sweet and romantic Christmas night seemed to be external to Haru, and nothing he tried to do could reach him. He felt ridiculous and stupid, it had been useless after all.

 

“Do you like this?” He asked softly, looking at Haru instead of avoiding it and escape through the view.

“What?” Haru asked looking at him.

“I don’t know, the ride, the walk, the snow, the lights, the night? Anything!” He finally said, exasperated with Haru’s steady expression, he was tired of that indifference. “Didn’t you like anything?”

Haru kept quiet, looking down to the floor.

“Nothing at all?”

“I didn’t like running.” He admitted.

“Ok...” Rin nodded, at least Haru was speaking now. “And what did you like?”

 

Silence again. He couldn’t stand it, Rin was about to drop the towel right then and give up. His dream night was a terrible reality. 

 

Until something finally broke the silence.

 

“Thank you,” Haru whispered softly. “for inviting me tonight. You didn’t have to and yet you did...”

Rin looked up to him, not daring to interrupt him since it wasn’t something usual for Haru to speak out loud. And since he wasn’t sure of being awake at all, this seemed so unreal for him...

“I can’t think of a particular thing I liked, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t the whole thing.” He kept going, slowly unlocking his eyes from the floor to look up to Rin’s confused face.

“Haru...”

“Merry Christmas, Rin.”

 

Even when he knew they were somewhere where he had to be specially careful whit any movement he could think of, Rin jumped from his seat to hug Haru. He didn’t mind how the cabin moved, and how the other warned or tried to stop him, Rin only wanted to make sure he was there, both of them, and that his words were real.

After a intimate struggle, Rin ended up sat beside Haru, arms warping him close to him, not wanting to let go of him until the cabin stopped it’s swinging. 

“I’m glad you liked it, Haru,” Rin whispered, just moving a bit, not to face him, but to hold him tighter. “Merry Christmas!”

Haru patted Rin’s back as he hugged him. After a while, he pushed him from it, asking him to let go of him.

Rin sighed, maybe it had been more than the allowed things he could do with Haru. But it was worthy.

 

“And... What did you liked the most, Rin?” Haru asked looking out through the window, avoiding Rin’s eyes.

 

Rin got closer, his arms still away from Haru but he wasn’t able to stay away completely from him. His eyes followed Haru’s out, looking down at the lights and the sparkles on the ocean’s fraction he could see from where they were. Maybe that was what Haru was looking at too. 

His heart kicked him inside. Strong. Loud. His mouth got dry and he felt nervous, sure of being a blushing mess right now. What he liked the most was what he wanted to say in first place:  _it had been Haru._

Even whit the prank he pulled with the snow-sakura flowers, his cold expression and his  _Haru-ish_  nature, Rin was glad just with spending some time together. And that was what he enjoyed the most of the night.

 

“I...” Rin started, testing his voice and how loud he could be, how it sounded with him being this nervous or if Haru would turn around to face him and make everything harder for him. 

 

Luckily, it wasn’t that bad. And Haru was too busy looking down.

 

Rin moved his arms again, resting them over Haru’s shoulders and holding him from behind, getting closer to his ears as he did, only wishing for his heart to stay discrete until he was able to say what he wanted out loud. Haru didn’t move, he just let the other fix himself hugging him in a very docile way, adapting to it.

 

“I liked being with you...” He whispered, and he could felt how something changed.

 

Haru’s breath changed and he moved his head a bit.

 

Not hit, no complain. Safe.

 

“Haru... You know why I asked you to come tonight, do you?” Rin started softly. “Christmas is-”

“Very Romantic, right?” Haru interrupted him.

Contrary of what he could thought, Haru was the first one to suggest that. And the one pulling away from the hug was him, and not Haru. He backed off a bit, confused again by the other’s words and how he seemed to be a step forward. 

 

“Was that what you were thinking, Rin?” Haru asked turning slightly, not enough to see him face to face, but only to look sideways at him.

“It was...” Rin laughed, shyly and trying to feel less nervous with this. Now that Haru could get an idea of where this was going, maybe it would go easier for him. “Don’t tell me you didn’t think it was.”

“I wasn’t sure.”

“Are you really Japanese?”

“Oh. So you meant romantic like  _that_?”

“Eh?” Rin moved even more, this time Haru turned himself too, facing Rin still held by him. 

“I came to think half of the things you say are romantic, but I wasn’t sure of you being serious about Christmas until you said that last thing.” Haru’s voice was soft, like if the one being put on blast was himself instead of Rin. “Was this... a date?”

 

Rin kept quiet, just looking at the boy he held in his arms. Haru seemed to be not like he usually was. He wasn’t frowning or complaining, he did was avoiding to look at him directly but... it was because he was blushing.

 

Nanase Haruka was blushing in his arms, at the top of a Ferris Wheel on Christmas.

 

He cleared his throat again, tilting his head to try and met Haru’s eyes.

 

“Did it feel like it?” He asked baldly.

“I don’t know...” the black haired whispered shaking his head. “I’m not that experienced on dates. But I heard Christmas night was special.”

“It was.” Rin concluded, confessing a part of his plan. There was no way this wasn’t a date, he was glad Haru could at least get the feeling of something date-like and not that casual late-night-hang-out. “It is.”

 

Haru faced him again. His nose inches away from Rin’s, eyes finally locking with his. 

 

His pulse gave him a strong resolution kick and pushed him forward to do what he wanted. Being like this, there was only one possible move, he’d had no other idea on mind. And he wouldn’t avoid it.

 

“Hey, Haru... You know what I liked the most about tonight?” He asked softly, not really sure of being heard at all after how low his volume had been. 

 

“What?” Haru asked, and Rin couldn’t tell if he really heard that or just guessed from Haru’s look.

 

“You.”

 

Time froze as he dropped this last word, the only thing moving was his blood through his veins, making him conscious of how fast this boy made his heart run; and Haru’s eyes as well. Haru’s eyes that were always so ineffably eloquent, absorbing him and making him want to say that again and again. 

 

 

It was Haru. And not only tonight, it had always been him.

 

 

Haru moved his arms too, holding Rin around his torso and with his hands pushing his back so he could get closer, if possible.

 

“Rin... Kiss me.” He asked, still looking up to his eyes. 

And with such view in front of him, there was no way Rin could deny, but he was still feeling so thrilled he couldn’t tell if this was true or just the best dream he ever dreamed. He loosed the held over Haru’s shoulders, resting his hands there as he was now being held by him.

“...What?”

“Kiss me.” Haru repeated, even softer, his eyes squinting down to Rin’s lips expectantly as he moved closer bit by bit. 

“And why don’t you kiss me?”

“I want to show you romantic things too, but I can’t... until you kiss me.”

“Why?”

“I don’t really know how to,” Haru admitted, biting his bottom lip almost embarrassed after saying this.

 

Rin moved forward, his hands leaving their place upon Haru’s shoulders to cup his face and keep him steady as he pressed their lips together. Soft, simple, but completely hallucinating for him.

He felt his face heating up by the time he moved away, and when he dared to open his eyes he found Haru in the same boat, his cheeks red and his expression soft.  _Lovely_. By the time those blue eyes looked at him again, he confirmed it.

 

“Was that...your first?” Rin asked, smiling softly to himself.

“Was that a kiss?” Haru whispered before shrugging. For someone who’s been kissed for the first time, Haru wasn’t acting like he looked right then. What a tease the boy could be.

“Hey! I’ll show you the best kiss ever!”

 

Rin moved Haru’s arms, making him cross them over his shoulders so he could hold the black haired’s body from his waist. He pulled him closer and Haru followed his lead, almost sitting on his lap as he pulled him too. Rin kissed him again, twice and thrice before daring to part his lips to make Haru’s slot in his and move a bit forward in this kiss issue. If Haru said the first one wasn’t one, then he had no option but to do it properly.

As Rin moved and Haru seemed to get more confident with this, his hands moved to mess with Rin’s hair, slightly tilting his head as Rin made his way through his system. 

They broke it to breathe once or twice before melting into it again. Their kisses snapped as they flew, leaving the shy first kiss behind and overshadowed with these. Rin grew braver, sliding his tongue out and hoping for Haru to allow him in, wishing for an answer of Haru’s tongue too. 

A whimper of the other’s lips escaped as they parted, tempted by Rin’s audacity and finally moving to press himself to him, sitting on his lap. They kissed, deeper and deeper, leaving winter eclipsed with the warmth of each kiss.

 

 

Until they remembered where were they.

 

 

Ok, they were high, really high, but they had to get down at some point... Ferries Wheel was still turning.

 

They looked at each other’s eyes, panting, blushed faces and messy heads. This was intimate and really special, something Rin had only dreamed before and it happened. It _really_ happened.

 

“Was that...a better kiss for you?” Rin asked smiling softly, it wasn’t that strange to find himself so embarrassed, but he couldn’t stand the way the only sound was his and Haru’s breath.

Haru looked away, just like he used to do when they were young and Rin said anything remotely romantic. And he couldn’t help but love that shy gesture of him. 

 

Shy Haru. Tease Haru. Clueless Haru. Lazy Haru. Winner Haru. Haru. He just liked the whole thing.

 

Haru pushed him lightly and sat down in the cabin’s bench again.

“Haru... By now you might know but...” Rin whispered brushing Haru’s black bangs before making his face turn to him. “I really  _really_  like you.”

“I know,” Haru said baldly. “I like you too.”

Rin smiled. “I didn’t knew that.”

“You thought I’d do this with you if I didn’t?” Haru said frowning, almost offended.

“No. I just wanted to hear you say that out loud.”

 

Haru rolled his eyes, Rin laughed. 

 

“Hey...” He got closer, hugging Haru again, not trying to do anything but feel him close to him. “Could you say that again?”

“You’re such a sap...” Haru complained, Rin tightened his hold and nuzzled again to convince him.

 

 

But Haru kept quiet.

 

 

“I like you, Rin.” Haru whispered softly after a long lapse of silence being held by Rin. The red haired nuzzled to him in gratitude before asking for him to say it again.

This kept going until they cabin was about to reach the bottom of the ride.

But Rin still felt on the top of the world.

 

They got out off to the snowy cold ground and walked though the crowd again. Rin held Haru’s hand all the way again, not wanting to lose him and sure of being approved now instead of forcing him like he did before. 

He felt incredible, he couldn’t stop laughing or erase the smile on his face. He was also sure he heard Haru laugh at some point of the night, but he wouldn’t be allowed to speak of it.

 

Haru’s laughter was his treasure, one of the best memories of the night. And just like that, it had to stay secret, either if it had been real or not.

 

They walked back to Haru’s place, after a quick walk around to see the lights together like any other couple would do and another stop by the Snow tree. He was happy, more than just happy. This was perfect. 

They got back to Haru’s door and Rin was still smiling, shivering but with that stupid I'm-so-in-love-with-you smile on his face. It was too late to be out walking or to catch a train to his own house, or so Haru said as his excuse to invite him to stay the night.

Both of them knew he didn’t need an excuse at all, Rin’d had accede without hearing any reason. Invading Haru’s personal space like usual, Rin walked in.

 

 

He fell asleep with a smile on his face, Haru in his arms and a kiss in his lips.

 

The lights, the snow, the walk, his cheesy confession. He had everything he wanted for Christmas.

 

Haru included.

**Author's Note:**

> Merry Christmas!!  
> I really hope you're happy with this gift :D I did my best and, to be true, I really wanted to make something related to the Mook before, this just gave me a good reason to start working.


End file.
